Thursday, 7 January 2010

The travels of Don and Samuel - Part B

Now realizing we were going to be, for a month or so, full time walkers, we new we had to get ourselves kitted out, lest the other pilgrims make fun of us. I, myself (Donald), found a nice little shop where I picked up a lovely walking stick, varnished with a wrist strap and a compass built into the head for just a few euros and a knife for...all purposes.

I (Sam), however -being a much more rugged and manly kind of guy- Surpassed Donald's Badassity and Scavenged his own stick using his keen intellect and superior survival skills. Donald was highly envious and deeply admired Sam's passion and Badassity.

Later that day sam soiled himself repeatedly. I begged him to stop as the smell was somewhat...inhumane but he just ran around in circles screaming, "I HAVE OLD BALLS AND LIKE MEN!!!!"

True story, I (Sam) did.

Monday, 4 January 2010

The travels of Don and Samuel - Part 1

From the month of August 6th to September 6th Sam and Donald embarked on an a walk, a pilgrimage, ney, an epic adventure. Our aim? To Walking 5oo miles (hold the cliched song) across Spain under the hot summer sun in an acceptable amount of time, a month or so, - and in a month, indeed, me managed it and here is our tale.

After Sam had been traveling with his family and working as a removal guy in Switzerland and I (Donald) had been working in a little cafe up in quite Orkney we set of and rendezvoused in London along with our good friend Holly.

After a few days of moderate partying and such, we took the cheapest flight possible to Spain but not before finding a group of people that had been camping outside a travel agents for four days with word of 200 £10 tickets to Australia. We were VERY tempted as the opening moment was a few hours away and there could not have been more than 50 people there but seeing that we would have missed the flight to Spain and with no idea of when the flights to Auzzie were to depart and the whole...getting back issue was in need of consideration and we didn't exactly have visas to be in Australia we demonstrated our lack of man parts and settled with Spain. Alas!

Valiantly the Twizzled Twain
verily, reached sunny, hot Spain
With a hop and a skip and a flourish and a bow
They arrived in the airport outside of Bilbao

How silly that they came
With but a euro twenty to their name
British Pounds were their range
So they set off to find a currency exchange

Without money for a bus
They walked with much fuss
but a euro twenty would do
To supply wine and beer for two

Oh cheap alchohol we found in spain
It helps so much with the walking pain
There is nothing that gets them quite so syked
than to have gone to a motorway and hitchhiked

So a suspicious man with boots and a cape
layed sam and don in the back seat for a...
lift. The city they arrived with little time to spare
but (I) Sam and Donald they didn't care

For a currency exchange they started to look
With only a poor grasp of the language and one phrase book.
They failed for hours and hours they would fail
But then they met an old woman who had a tail (well... maybe)

Exchange did she give them, euros from pounds
then she asked would you like to pound?
'No' I replied, you have a tail
I'm too young, you'd go to jail!

The tainty exchanger with a a flourish of her tail
I'm serious! I swear she did have a tail!
Said "good luck on the camino, I hope you do not fail
...yes I am perfectly aware that I have a tail"

After Spanish tortilla and desperado beer
The road ahead they began to leer
With a kick and a twirl and the spark of corona
They set off on their path towards merry pamplona

They arrived at last but ever so late
The pilgrimage, here, that was their fate
beside a tree they made their bed
and slept there thinking of the day ahead.

On wake-up they started rollin' and rocking
and began in the heat of their first day of walking
a long walk ahead across this lazy nation
with Santiago their destination. be continued